100 Ways to Kill a Doctor: Nightmare on Los Robles Avenue
by kimbee73
Summary: What if the kiss between Sheldon and Penny was not a nightmare for Leonard?


**A/N: Okay so I was reading these stories and I thought wow some of these writers are very clever in the ways they have killed both Leonard and Amy. I thought to myself, let me try and do one as well. Now as a die hard Shamy fan I am not a fan of character bashing but I think this fits the rules of the challenge.**

 **To my loyal fans: I am doing this for fun...I promise read it and you may enjoy it.**

 **I am prepared for all the poor guest reviews I will get telling me I should kill myself or something along those lines, I have read them on others. But let me tell you if you read this you might be surprised.**

 **I don't own these characters I just like to take them out to play:**

Rules:

1\. Sheldon/Penny – They can be platonic, romantic, smutty, Super Heroes/Villains, etc.

2\. Leonard/Amy's death MAY occur anytime from the Pilot thru Season 9

3\. The death must be completed in a single chapter, although you are welcome to contribute as many different forms of death as you like as long as they are a chapter each.

4\. The story must be no more than 1,500 words long.

5\. Deadline is October 31, 2015.

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Leonard was standing at the kitchen counter in the middle of the night having a cup of tea when Sheldon came out from his bedroom.

"Why are you up?" Sheldon asked him, confused at Leonard's presence.

"How am I supposed to sleep? I've been married less than twenty-four hours and my wife isn't speaking to me." He answered.

"Perhaps you can think of this in a more positive light." Sheldon started, going to the refrigerator for a drink. "In one day, you've managed to do what it takes many couples decades to achieve." Leonard looked at him with disdain. He was about to reply when there was a knock on the door and Penny walked in.

"Hi." She said as she came in.

"Hey." Leonard perked up a bit.

"You couldn't sleep either?" She asked.

"Of course not." Leonard answered her.

"Me neither." Sheldon commented. "But I just had a tickle in my throat. Not profound marital problems."

"What are we going to do?" Leonard asked her sincerely.

"I don't know." She answered.

"Please, tell me how I can fix it." He begged.

"Glad you asked." Sheldon decided it was time to butt in to the conversation, walking over towards them. "As I see it, there's a simple solution. Your lips had a dalliance with the lips of another woman." He said to Leonard. "It seems only logical that to restore balance to the relationship, you should find another man and dally with him." He said to Penny. "And by dally, I mean some hardcore mouth-on-mouth action."

"Okay that is the stupidest thing I've ever heard." Leonard said to them.

"Actually I think he is onto something." Penny said.

"You can't be serious." He said, not believing what she was saying. "Cause I messed up and made out with a girl, you're gonna do the same with a random guy?"

"I'm currently single." Sheldon said to her.

Penny looked at him and realized he was right. "That's true. You are."

Leonard looked between the two of them perplexed. "What is happening?!"

Sheldon looked at Leonard. "I'll tell you what is happening. I am saving my best friend's marriage." He grabbed Penny and kissed her with all his might. She was totally taken off guard but soon realized just how good a kisser Sheldon really was. No wonder Amy always had that look when she was leaving his apartment after date night. She finally threw her arms around Sheldon when he put his hand on her waist. She picked her leg up and he grabbed her thigh.

"What the hell?" Leonard screamed. Sheldon and Penny continued to kiss in front of him. When they finally pulled up for air, Penny looked flustered.

"Wow Sheldon that was amazing! No wonder Amy is always so happy when she leaves you." Penny said to him.

"Oh I have never kissed her like that. I could never." Sheldon said to her. "Want to try again."

"Yes please." Penny said. Sheldon grabbed her again this time running his tongue along her lips. Penny happily opened her mouth and let his tongue gain access.

"What the hell?" Leonard screamed.

The two finally came up for air and Penny said to both men. "Leonard has never kissed me like that before."

"Oh come on, yes I have." Leonard said. "In fact I can show you right now." He walked over to her and grabbed her around the waist but Penny pushed him away.

"I'm sorry. You can never kiss me the way Sheldon just did." She said.

"So what are you trying to say?" Leonard said.

"I guess I never really realized how I felt about Sheldon." She told him.

"Well this is a bit of a quandary." Sheldon said.

"Why is that?" Penny asked.

"You are now legally bonded to Leonard. I guess you will have to get a divorce." Sheldon said.

"Oh there is no need. We never consummated the marriage. We can just get an annulment." Penny said.

"We are not getting an annulment." Leonard exclaimed.

"I don't think you have much of a choice Leonard. You cheated on me." Penny said.

"Yes but I told you that before we got married and you were okay with it."

"But you didn't tell me the entire story. So you entered into this marriage lying to me."

"Only because you told me to stop talking about it!" Leonard screamed at her. "We are not getting an annulment! If I can't have you, no one can." He said and he grabbed a kitchen knife from the counter. He lunged at Penny but was stopped short when a gun shot went off. Leonard fell to the ground in a heap.

"What the hell did you do?" Penny screamed.

"I was protecting you. I knew this gun would come in handy someday. I thought I would need it when I got tenure and Leonard was jealous of me. Instead he got jealous because I stole his wife from him. Who knew?"

"Do you always carry a gun with you?" Penny asked impressed.

"Only in the middle of the night when I come out in the living room by myself. I have had it since we got robbed a few years ago but started carrying it when the tenure thing started. I guess I won't have to worry about it anymore."

"I guess not. So what do we do now?" Penny asked.

"I suppose we have to dispose of his body." Sheldon said.

"But where?" Penny said.

"Let's not worry about that right now." Sheldon said and pulled her in for a kiss. Just as it started to get passionate there was a knock at the door and Amy walked in.

"Sheldon what the hell?" Amy screamed looking at the scene in front of her.

"Amy what are you doing here?" He asked.

"I was feeling guilty about breaking up with you and thought I would come over to talk. What the hell is going on?" She screamed. Before Sheldon had a chance to answer the gun went off again and Amy slumped to the floor.

"I guess we have two bodies to dispose of now." Sheldon said.

"I guess we do." Penny said and pulled Sheldon in for a passionate kiss.

Sheldon sat straight up in bed and screamed.

"What is it?" Amy asked, waking up to his screaming.

"I just had a horrible dream. I dreamt that I was carrying a gun for some reason and I killed Leonard with it. And then for some reason Penny killed you with it."

"Oh wow what an awful nightmare." Amy said to him.

"Yeah well that is not the worst of it." He said.

"What could possibly be worse than killing me and Leonard?" She asked.

"I was making out with Penny." Sheldon said.


End file.
